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There are no happily-ever-afters in this fairy tale.
You will find no fairy god-mothers who turn pumpkins into curfew-conscious carriages, nor evil witches doling out poisoned apples. No workaholic dwarves and certainly no overzealous talking candlesticks.
There is a prince, but you may find him not quite as charming as one would expect him to be, and the knight hardly ever takes off his armor.
There is a dragon, of course—that’s what fairy tales are for after all (or so, I’ve been told)—and a damsel pre-requisitely in distress so subtle, why, you’d think she’s doing just fine.