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Even it was for a couple of hours, my heart started aching the second I walked back in to his empty house. I couldn't believe I was living alone almost for a year now. It felt like he and I were together as far as I could recall. I dragged myself up to my room lazily, already missing him a little too much. I stopped at the door to his room. It wasn't closed. I inhaled a big gust of air which lingered with my favorite scent. The scent I nuzzled myself to sleep for the past few weeks. I stepped in to the most organized room of a boy I have ever seen myself.
The bed was neatly made. Thick books were stacked accordingly to the sides of the table. To do list stuck on the table lamp was checked on time. Was he always been studious? I thought. A huge roll of paper was tucked next to the pile of books. I took it out carefully without disturbing the pile. The letters 'Ms' was written on the bottom of the roll. Out of curiosity I spread it on the table.
Those were huge drawings. As I looked in to the first intently, I was stunned. It was just like the one I received few weeks ago, a lot bigger, much detailed one though. There were three of them. Each contained a nicely sketched pencil drawing along with a caption under it.
Each frame was familiar as I knew they were my usual getaways. In the first one I was in the corner table of the cafeteria with others. I had the poker face on as usual. But even I could see the loneliness in my posture, though the others were having a good time. There was no way he could have missed it. It was clearly visible. But how did he picture me like that. Was he been there? On the edge of the paper there was this verse in his beautiful handwriting.
“To feel someone in every heartbeat,
To find someone in every thought,
To see someone with closed eyes,
To miss someone for an entire lifetime
There is nothing I can do, though I wish I could”
My eyes welled up with moisture as I read the last line. Before they get all wet, I flipped it over to the next paper.
“Guess I didn’t notice it before, but now I do. Her favorite songs told me more about her than she ever did. Now I want to know more. Now I want to read every book she ever read and understand how in hell her world could be less important to her than the ones she dived into every day. I still can’t understand how she doesn’t see the stars in her eyes or the sun in her smile or the music in her voice. Cause I see it now.”
It was written under a sketch of an aisle in the library. He hadn't missed me in between the shelves of my usual section sitting on the floor reading. Even my headphones were hanging around my neck.
I turned over to the last one eagerly to see what might be on it. Tears were streaming down my cheeks. On the paper a girl was lying helplessly on what seemed like a hospital bed. I figured easily who that girl was and I knew which day he tried to bring back as I read the caption. His words were like painful blisters in my throat. The line read below,
“It was so loud in my head the words I should have said, as I drown in my regrets…in my agony. No… I cannot take the words I never said.”
Every paper was time stamped. This one was sketched two days before that freaking psycho incident at my apartment.
I sat on the floor leaning on to the wall, hugging all the sketches to my chest. Tears started pouring down without my permission. This time I didn't fight to resist, because those tears weren’t meaning to express sorrow anymore, because now the sun shines brightly in our little blissful present. For what seemed like hours I wondered how I had always been in his mind, just as he was on mine. It was painful to remind everything that had happened. But now with everything taking on to a good path, I am happy. Through everything we've been through, I wouldn't trade any of it for what we have become today, my cure.
The ringing in my pocket brought me back. I wiped the tears, struggling to see the screen clearly. I answered expecting the familiar playful voice on the other side. And it does.
"Hey, Curly" it was Liam.
"Hey Liam,-" my voice was slurring
"Curly, what's going on?" his voice turned intense which I don't prefer much.
"What?" Still my voice didn't come out right.
"Are you crying?" Oh yeah, he wouldn't miss a thing. "Curly, talk to me."
"No, No Liam. I'm perfectly fine. I just woke up." I tried to slip away though I knew even trying was no use.
"You can't fool me Curly. Was it Jayden? Do you want me to pick you up?" he just doesn't stop.
"Oh come on Liam. He's not even at home. He's out. I was just going through-" I was tried to lie better so that he'd easily buy. "You know that dusty old stuff. So I was coughing like hell"
"Okay whatever. I'm coming. Stay up" he insisted.
"You're coming here seriously? Liam you don't have to. I said it's nothing" I tried to convince once again though it was no use.
"Ease up curly, I just dropped Mel off. It's just few minute drive from here. I'll stop by. Just stay up okay, I have no intention to sleep on the porch waiting for you to open the door"
I giggled as the tears already dried off. "Okay. Okay. See you soon then"
"See you in a few I'm just pulling out from Mel's" and the line went dead.
I came out of Jay's room; still the sketches were pinned to my chest. As I wandered in the corridor to my room, a sound of a door unlocking sliced through the silence, probably the front door. "Liar" I said to myself heading back to the staircase. He told me it would take few minutes to be here, yet he was already at my door.
He told me that he was just leaving Mel's. That has to be a lie. How come he could be here in less than a second...........Unless it wasn't Liam really?