When Love Dies

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Chapter 42

He led me out of the house and together, we walked down to the beach. It had gotten rather chilly and I appreciated the fact that I had my sweater to keep me warm. I hobbled into the water, Jason behind me and the sound of the waves tumbling before breaking at the shore helped bury my knees and I felt relaxed. I inhaled the air and although it odored fishy, it revived my senses. The ocean sure was magical!

Mesmerised by the ambience, I was oblivious to being pushed in to the ocean. Reality hit me through the impact of the briny water against my tongue. I didn't feel that coming and was more than overwhelmed. I was saturated from head to toe and spat out the salty water.

When I recovered, I swam my way back to the shore—Yes, I was taught how to swim a few months before prom. But I wasn't a pro-— coughing a little.

My so called "boyfriend" was busy in a laughing fit. His voice although infuriated me,  captured my heart and did funny things to my stomach.

Oh dear! I was so whipped.

"How dare you do that to me?" I asked as soon as I regained myself. I could feel his presence and knew he was close by. I halted.

"You should have seen the look on your face when I thrutched you. I wish I had my camera with me." He replied in between rounds of laughter.

I didn't know what overcame me, perhaps the desperation for revenge, I pounced on him and that caught him off guard which landed us both on the damp shore.

"Take that, you... You crazy boyfriend." I shoved my wet body on him so he'd realize how soaked I was. Nature seemed to be by my side as sand coupled with my wet clothes penetrated his mouth. And with the way he spat continuously, I knew my plan was a success. I smiled to myself.

"Crazy boyfriend? Is that all you got?" He poked fun at me.

"Well, that was all I could think of." I shrugged, mentally slapping myself for not having more words to come up with.

"Well, think of this." He said, instantly, he pressed his lips against mine.

He took me to another stage of oblivion. He made me completely forget about everything else but his lips. The kiss melted my thoughts and heightened my senses. I quivered tremulously, not as a result of the chilly atmosphere, but the drowning pleasure.

Maybe this was it!

Maybe this was the moment I could lose control and let this new but familiar feeling take the wheel. I could finally love and be loved. I could finally give and take.

The night began a dance of its own and the ocean danced slowly, the waves, rolling over and over, until it slowly engulfed my feet which had begun to tingle in a mild sensation. We switched positions and he was hovering above me.

This was just the perfect timing.

"Nonsense. I want you to have fun. Get drunk, dance if you can and mix with the crowd. But one thing is clear... Never have sex with any man dear. Save yourself for the right man. Abstain until marriage."

Mum's voice, like lightning, flashed by and her words stung. But this was the right man and what was the guarantee that I would live to get married?

"I was wrong. The percentage of it being successful is thirty percent."

Doctor O'Brien's voice countered mum's and made me realise that my time was short and I was missing out on the good things of life. And most importantly, I loved and trusted Jason enough to know that he would be gentle with me. I knew I could give my virginity to him and he would take maximum care of me.

This was the moment I would cherish to my grave. I would die and still relish in this special night.

The night I'll lose my virginity to the love of my life.

Breaking away from his lips, I said the words I've always imagined to say my whole life.

"Make love to me."

I gently pulled up his head which was already feasting on my neck, no doubt, leaving a hickey there and placed his lips back on mine, encouraging him to seal the deal.

"What?" He asked seemingly confused, just when I was about to close my eyes and give myself fully to him.

"Make love to me. Please!" I pleaded. Never would I have imagined begging anyone for this. But here I was...

His lips came back to mine and I heaved a sigh of relief. At last I would be whole. I felt an ounce of doubt but tossed it aside. I was doing the right thing by giving myself to the man whom I believed would cherish me.

Minutes of  shirts unbuttoned, sighs and moans later, Jason broke the kiss. I waited anxiously for him to carry on from where he stopped but he remained motionless above me.

Did I do anything wrong? Was I too inexperienced for him? Gripped with fear and anxiety, I waited.

"I can't do this." He said at last. Never have I been so hurt than at this moment.

Rejection hurt more than death itself!

"Why? Am I... Am I not good enough?" I struggled to say the words, dreading the answer. I placed my palms on his chest and pushed him away from me, before getting up to a sitting position. My hair, clothes and entire body were literally covered in sand but I cared less.

"Are you kidding me? You're not only good enough, you're the most perfect thing I've ever laid my eyes on." He said in a rush and slowed down when he spoke the next words.

"Which is why I can't do this." He concluded.

Should I laugh right now or cry? Should I be amazed that he finds me perfect but can't do the one thing I ask of him?

Big ups to the most confusing boyfriend ever.

"Cassiopeia, I've fantasized about this with you and here it is and I want to seize this moment with my whole life but somehow, this doesn't feel right." He said.

"I love you so much and can't stop thinking about you. I'm more than honoured being your boyfriend and I don't want to ruin it. You see, each time I think of making love to you in my head, there's always a ring on your finger. There's always a ring on both our fingers. Cassiopeia, what I mean is nothing will make me the happiest man on earth but claiming you as mine but I want it to be at the right time. I want to make love to you when I've succeeded in putting that ring on your finger. After we've walked to the altar and declared our vows." He said.



Osaro Oghadeva

Edited: 21.04.2019

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