My Twisted Promises

XVIII

After all, if you aren't willing to kill for it — how important can it be?

These words sank deep now. Every second her mind left her questioning Shannlys's motives she just ended up with his words. Back then they seemed extreme but true for the anteannae, those born of emotions and desires. She felt the trueness of these words, too — no reason to lie to herself, she was willing to kill for those she loved. And still...

Her gaze kept returning to Aelisar. To his porcelain skin with thin cracks of darkness at the jawline — the jawline so sharp he could kill with it. To his graphite hair, still messy after the fight, all tangled up and slightly longer than it seemed back at the Court of Reflections. To his shimmering pearly-gold eyes watching everything in the damned house with a curiosity of an innocent newborn animal.

He killed all these people. He killed them for her. He also ripped the ravenborn into shreds to keep her safe. And yet, back at the Dark Courts he never resorted to bringing death unless he had no other choice. And there was always another choice.

Nobody would ever dare say he didn't love his people. He loved them with everything he was.

"Am I too lost?" — his voice startles her. She blinks, unaware of the fact he's been eyeing her for a moment already. — "You keep having this look..."

"No. I mean..." — she knows she's unable to hold a smile. "You seem lost. It feels so... absurd."

He blinks. Then laughs.

"I am absurd?.."

"You've always been this... all-knowing, all-powerful creature, and now..."

"There's plenty of things I've never been able to see or experience, Thorn. I've never felt anything you've always had. I had mirrors to look at the world but... without a chance to feel things I never wanted to seek more. I never wanted to know there's more. Until I met you."

Her face feels hot. Her blood boils. She has to bite her tongue to keep calm.

"I had nothing to interest you with."

"You had everything." He says, smiling with that bitter shade of sadness on his pale lips. "You were everything. You are."

"Stop it."

"You are, Thorn. To me, you're everything — and more."

(По "Витражи Резных Сердец")